Who wants another story of how post 9/11 plane travel and being the dullest tool in the box don't really go together? Why of course! Passengers on American Airlines flight 1053 from Washington to Dallas got a scare a couple of weeks ago. Partway through their flight a strong smell of sulphur appeared seemingly out of nowhere. Worried about this they reported it to the plane staff who told the pilot.

The pilot radioed it in and decided that it was not safe to continue the journey. A quick diversion to Nashville, Tennessee was made resulting in an emergency landing.

The FBI, Transportation Safety Administration and airport authority were all brought out to help deal with the suspected explosive arson attempt. Each of the 99 passengers and 5 staff was herded off the plane, taken through security checks and all the luggage was removed from the plane. They sent specialist canine units into the plane to search out any evidence of what went on. They found a few used matches.

So what had happened? Was this some shoe-bomber-esque terrorist attack to bring down the flight? It turned out if wasn't. Rather, some woman had inadvertently let rip with a smelly fart during the trip. Embarrassed by the less than delicate fragrance, she ignited a few matches - of which you are allowed to take up to 8 books on such flights as long as you don't use them for some reason - in order to disguise the smell (unless of course this was a cover story for fart-ignition pranks). It clearly worked a treat.

For some reason the woman didn't choose to come forward and explain when the passengers raised the alert in the first place. Did she volunteer the information when the plane started its emergency diversion? No. How about when the FBI started to interrogate her? No. However after the questioning got more intense, she broke down and confessed her misdemeanour.

Everyone else then no doubt spent hours reboarding and getting their luggage back on. This foolish lady however was not allowed to get back on the plane and is in fact banned from going on American Airlines flight for "a very long time". She does however remain at liberty without charge to go spread her noxious gases elsewhere.